Over two years ago, my husband, Kevin, and I were sitting in our home office contemplating our agency’s newest list of Waiting Children from China. After many unsuccessful months of fertility treatments, we had recently decided to adopt a child. Kevin was adopted, so we both felt very passionate about the benefits of creating our family in this way. We also had a great love for the Chinese culture, as Kevin had previously worked in Beijing. We had not, however, considered adopting a “special needs” child until that afternoon.

I have to admit that, in the beginning, the greatest advantage to adopting a special needs child was the reduction in waiting time. Like so many, we were daunted by the required waits of up to two years to adopt a child from the “Non-Special Needs” China program. Not a patient person by nature, I could not imagine the torture of that kind of anticipation. I was also paranoid that the program may close, for some unforeseen reason, before we were allowed to adopt. I hated to think of the possibility of investing all of the time and money, with no child to show for it.

So, that Saturday afternoon, Kevin and I sat down in front of the computer to really take a serious look at these Waiting Children for the first time. I had suffered from a chronic auto-immune disease for years and had undergone a hodge-podge of tests and procedures in the process, so I was not intimidated by the various diagnoses. Kevin was, however, a little more reticent about the potentially dire sounding cases. In particular, he was cautious of the heart disease diagnoses, certain that we could never bear the possibility of losing a child. He preferred the children with more external issues, such as cleft palate or missing or extra digits.

As we viewed the photos and read the profiles, we each decided on our favorite child. Kevin’s choice was a baby with polydactylism, who was less than a year old and the youngest on the list. I agreed that there were benefits to adopting a younger baby, and this one certainly seemed like a good fit for our family. However, I just felt indifferent when I looked at her picture. I just didn’t feel the same pang of longing, which I did for the child I had chosen. This baby immediately captured my heart with her wide eyes, crazy spiked hair, and little mouth that looked like a baby bird’s beak. She was about six months older than the first baby, but her birthday was in February. I took this as a favorable sign, as both mine and Kevin’s birthdays also fall in February. Kevin laughed when he saw her photo, obviously as intrigued as I had been. That is, until he heard her diagnosis of congenital heart disease.

After more discussion and research on the diagnoses, we decided that the wisest choice would be the younger baby. I was a bit disappointed, but went ahead and filled out the extensive application. I clicked on “send” and left the rest to fate. Later that night, I could not seem to get the heart disease baby’s face out of my mind. She seemed so familiar to me.

The next day, I decided to take another look at the baby’s profile one last time, hoping to get her face out my mind. Kevin walked into the office and saw my sorrowful eyes staring at the photo. Then, out of nowhere, he said simply, “If you want her, we’ll get her.” I hardly knew what to say, as tears came to my eyes. I just nodded and rose to hug him.

The following day, I sent an email to our agency, asking if we could possibly change our application. We were told that we could, of course, withdraw the first application and submit a new one for the second baby, Chun’an. As I feverishly typed, I felt as if I was writing a book, trying to convince the agency that we would be the best parents for little Chun’an. I sent it off, knowing that there were probably many more parents feeling the same longing for this precious angel. As we waited the two weeks for notification of our status, I prepared myself for disappointment.

Then, the day after Mother’s Day, I received a call notifying me that Kevin and I were one of three finalists for Chun’an. My hands shook, as I underwent a conference call interview with a panel from the agency. I was so nervous, that I hardly remember what I had said, only that I had gotten the impression that it all went well. I was told that they would be in touch by the end of the day with a decision. Much to our surprise, that day ended with no call at all. I had, at least, expected a call to confirm that other candidates had been chosen. That night, I prayed for little Chun’an- that the best parents had been chosen for her and that she would have a happy life with them. I cried for a while, but finally resigned myself to acceptance.

Then the next morning, my heart stopped when I saw the agency’s phone number on my caller ID. I answered, preparing myself for the rejection, with which I had already made peace. The voice apologized for not calling yesterday, then went on to say that they would very much like for Kevin and I to be little Chun’an’s parents. I must have screamed for two solid minutes, repeating over and over “Thank you!” When I hung up, I immediately called Kevin and asked him if he was ready to be a Daddy. He was as thrilled as I, and we celebrated one of the happiest days of our lives together.

Now, almost two years later, we cannot imagine our lives without Jade Chun’an. She is a loving, intelligent, and beautiful little girl. Much to our surprise, her heart disease is asymptomatic, only requiring yearly monitoring and antibiotics prior to any dental cleanings. Her official diagnosis is supravalvular pulmonary stenosis, which is fairly rare. We are told by her cardiologist that the defect will never disappear, either staying the same or getting worse. If her condition does indeed digress, she will require open-heart surgery. If and when that day comes, Kevin and I will vigilantly stand by her side.

Otherwise, Jade has been an extremely healthy little girl. She has only had one rash and one cold in the two years she has been home, which we are told is quite remarkable. She loves her gymnastics and ballet classes and has no limitations on her activities.

Kevin and I hope that other perspective parents will gain hope from our story and will be encouraged to consider a special needs adoption. We were informed by our home study social worker that our state considers all internationally adopted children “special needs”, as they all require specialized care. This care takes into consideration the issues of possible malnutrition, developmental and speech delays, and attachment disorders, which are more common in post-institutionalized children. I am also aware of many children adopted from the “non-special needs” program, who arrived with undiagnosed medical problems, requiring more care than our “special needs” child.

The point here is that any child can become a “special needs” child, whether she is labeled “special needs”, assumed to be “normal”, or even a biological child. There are no guarantees in life. The best any of us parents can do is to follow our hearts and play the hand we are each dealt. There is no doubt in my mind that we found the perfect child for our family in Jade Chun’an. Anything the future brings will just be part of the package. Each day, Kevin and I gratefully accept this package as a miraculous gift.

Cathy Crenshaw Doheny is a freelance writer living in Charlotte, NC. She and her husband, Kevin, have one daughter, Jade, adopted from China's Waiting Child program. Cathy is currently in the process of writing a book of memoirs, SURVIVAL MODE. Cathy serves as Senior Staff Writer for Carolina Chronicles television show.